Attachment styles are not genetically inherited, however they often pass down from parents to their children. Unfortunately parenting is not formally taught, and thus individuals tend to do what they learned from their own parenting experiences
Working at our relationship in my opinion is a balance of give and take, a balance between having our needs met and being selfless. We will at times feel vulnerable and at other times need to be strong. We will at times be wrong, and at times make correct decisions. It is about shifting our focus from “I” to “us”.
Partnership describes the functionality of our relationship. A marriage partnership does not bluntly imply the “terms and conditions” of our relationship, and although, like in business, we may be bound by a verbal or written agreement and follow similar principles, relationships refer to the guidelines we follow on a day-to-day basis.
Both parent and teen are experiencing change within the relationship during this time. Many parents wonder during these years whether or not they are ‘a good parent’. Rest assured that, although the relationship dynamics are changing, they don’t need you any less than when they were little, they just need you differently.
We have been living in a changed world for nearly 2 years. The Covid-19 pandemic has been around for 2 years and has changed our lives in many ways. During this pandemic, we have suffered major losses such as the loss of family and friends, however, we have also suffered a wave of other losses.
During the past 3 weeks we have read in the news of many teenagers in schools who have committed suicide. Covid is affecting our teenagers very negatively, working with teens every day; I evidently see the effects it has on our teens. Our teenagers are struggling.
Anybody with a 3-year-old has experienced these ever popular, ground-breaking, earth-please-suck-me-in moments in public. As a matter of fact, you’d be struggling to find a parent who hasn’t had at least one embarrassing tale to tell when it comes to their little one breaking down in the middle of a crowded place. So take comfort in knowing that you are most certainly not alone. Here are some ways to tame that toddler tantrum.
Everyone in our lives can need a caring, non-judgmental, and empathetic room at some point in their lives. When the time comes, the relationship you already have will serve as a basis for constructing this "container" in which you keep space for the other individual. If you accept the challenge, your desire to be of service to the other person will be the first building block for holding that sacred space.
With schools reopening soon, and all sorts of arrangements are being made by schools to accommodate social distancing in efforts to keeping children safe, we are again faced with the challenge of school days, and “home-schooling” days.
Death is one of the hardest topics to talk to your child about, especially when you are dealing with grief yourself. It is an inevitable topic that you won’t be able to dismiss, especially not during a pandemic where illness & death numbers are all around. It is an inescapable part of life, which your child will want to understand.
It is often hard for a teenager to admit that they need help. They might try to solve the problem themselves or turn to other means to hide what they are going through. This might particularly be hard for parents to determine when their teenager needs help or when its just the normal behaviour of a teenager.
Dit is dikwels baie moeilik vir ‘n tiener om te erken dat hulle hulp benodig. Hulle probeer dit self oplos of hulle probeer dit weg steek. Dit maak dit baie moeilik vir ouers om te bepaal wanneer hulle tiener werklik professionele hulp benodig en of dit slegs normale gedrag is.
Happy and well-behaved children have assertive parents who are consistent and positive when discipling their children. All human-beings love rules and so do our children. We love them so much that we bring them into our leisure activities, such as rules in soccer or rugby. Have you noticed, when children play someone tends to be the boss and there are certain rules which must be followed? Rules therefore come naturally to us and you as a parent are the boss.
A trauma bond can be thought of as running on a never-ending hamster wheel, where periods of intermittent reinforcement (love, promises and kindness) are combined with periods of physical, emotional and psychological abuse. The more you want to get off the hamster wheel, the more you feel confined to the wheel and trapped in the movement to keep running. The cycle becomes toxic as the need to regain the feelings of infatuation that were felt at the beginning of the relationship, leads the victim to repeatedly forgive their partner in order to return to the good feelings associated with the relationship.
Sosiale issolasie is op almal se lippe en vir almal van ons met kinders beteken dit een ding. Ons moet op “stock” op “snacks” en by bly met aktiwiteite om ons kinders besig te hou!! Alhoewel sommige ouers baie kreatief is en dit geniet om nuwe speletjies uit te dink is dit vir ander ‘n groot kopseer.
We understand the current situation is causing a lot of fear, anxiety and stress and we would like to assist as far as possible. Under normal circumstances, we would prefer to offer counselling sessions in person. Seeing as social distancing is the responsible reaction to the situation at hand, we have decided to make our sessions available online.
Does being a good mom mean that you pack the perfect lunch box, does it mean that you serve on all the “mommy committee’s” available, does it mean that you never miss a cricket or tennis match or does it mean that your house is always tidy and you’re children are excelling in academics or sport activities?? Unfortunately to some extent these are the measures you’re being “judged” on if you are a parent in the year 2020 and for a lot of mommies this makes sense. We live in a world that is performance based, that is, if you do not excel in something you are seen as a failure.
Most importantly: keep yourself calm and controlled! A child looks at his/her parent's reaction to determine the degree of threat. If he/she sees that you are clearly upset, emotional and crying, he/she will respond accordingly. Try to stay calm, relaxed and friendly when you and your child separate, it will automatically make him/her feel more calm and safe.
‘n Mens kan een van hoofsaaklik twee situasies in jou huis hê. Alle matrikulante is; hoe sal ‘n mens sê, nie so leergierig as die ander nie… terwyl ander dag en nag studeer. Tot so ‘n mate dat die hele gesin naderhand gespanne is. Wanneer ‘n mens ‘n paar jaar later terugkyk, giggel jy in jou mou, maar defnitief nie terwyl dit aan die gebeur is nie.
This shame and guilt led me to question everything in my life and led me to being more vulnerable to myself and to others. Brene Brown states; “The ability to hold something we've done or failed to do up against who we want to be is incredibly adaptive. It's uncomfortable but it's adaptive.”