The counsellor-client and loved-one-to-loved-one relationships are fundamentally different. Following are 6 differences between a counselor and a friend, and how both parties may support you in a different manner.
We are currently living in ever-changing times and emotional maturity might be just be one of the things that will keep us sane. Emotional maturity consists of two components, firstly your ability to understand and identify your emotion and being honest about your feelings. Secondly being able to manage that emotion no matter what circumstances you find yourself in. Emotional maturity are the little golden nuggets of life.
It is often hard for a teenager to admit that they need help. They might try to solve the problem themselves or turn to other means to hide what they are going through. This might particularly be hard for parents to determine when their teenager needs help or when its just the normal behaviour of a teenager.
Dit is dikwels baie moeilik vir ‘n tiener om te erken dat hulle hulp benodig. Hulle probeer dit self oplos of hulle probeer dit weg steek. Dit maak dit baie moeilik vir ouers om te bepaal wanneer hulle tiener werklik professionele hulp benodig en of dit slegs normale gedrag is.
I often get asked the question "Why should I go to counselling" as if there is a textbook, one size fits all answer. There is no straightforward way to sum up the importance of counselling, because in my eyes the benefits of counselling is personal in nature and therefore, infinite.
There is nothing I have so keenly needed on my own journey than someone just sitting down with me in the mud; in the hurt and in the breaking. There has been nothing so comforting and endearing as someone just really seeing me. Acknowledging me, my feelings, my thoughts and my behaviours. Being so attuned to my every movement in that moment that I feel overwhelmingly heard and understood.
Admitting to yourself that you need professional help can be quite daunting. After you have finally plucked up the courage to make the appointment, you might find yourself wondering about – even researching – the person that is about to hear your life story. Can you really trust them? How much should you say? Are they really all a little crazy? – I mean they chose a profession where they listen to people’s problems all day!! Will he / she be analysing me the whole time?
In this article, we answer some pressing questions with regards to what the law says about various child-related issues that may pop up in your practice. Parental consent, best interest of the child and limitations of confidentiality are discussed. We also, very briefly touch on how to safeguard yourself when it comes to payments of your sessions.
It is heartbreaking that many people judge the psychology world by the picture that Hollywood has painted for us. In countless movies the psychologist is portrayed as a know-it-all guru who traps people in an extended, dependency driven relationship. There is a big fluffy couch where the patient will lie down and share their story, while the distracted ‘shrink’ continuously asks “how do you feel about that” and bluntly stops the session the moment time is up. In many movies the client never resolves issues and is just told to come back next week. In light of this I am overjoyed to tell you that most counsellors sees this portrayed image and goes out of their way to break and correct this view of the counselling world.
So your child comes to you and tells you he is gay or she is lesbian. You feel that the earth has dropped out from under your feet. You look at them and try to read their faces. A million questions go through your mind. You look at them and wait, are they joking? Your mind screams, “Please just laugh and say I’m only joking”. It does not come. You realise this is real. You feel for a moment you’re in a Mexican standoff.
Oh, but the TIREDNESS. I will never forget. Never ever, ever, ever!! It lasted for 18 years (sorry my dearest sisters). One night I woke up and I couldn’t find my sweetheart last born - oh my freak! She was lying on the carpet! What was happening to me? How did she land there? Was I going to be arrested for child abuse? I could just see the headlines: “Social worker abandons newborn on floor”.
It is easy for a platonic friendship to evolve into an emotional affair. All it takes is time, emotional investment and a little denial. Make sure that you and your spouse have very clearly defined boundaries when it comes to friendships and stick to these and respect them.